All the Ann Coulter Jokes from the Comedy Central Roast of Rob Lowe

Last night, Comedy Central aired its celebrity roast of Rob Lowe last night, but it seemed nobody wanted to roast Lowe when they realized Ann Coulter was there.

The show hardly spent 2 minutes roasting Lowe, before everyone turned their attention to conservative pundit (read: "nutcase") Ann Coulter, who -- for some unknown reason -- was on stage. Throughout the two-hour roast, comedian after comedian came up and took shots at Coulter.

At the beginning, Coulter sat with an uncomfortable smile painted -- or possibly molded in plastic -- on her face.

As the show progressed, however, her smile turned to an angry stare. By the end, she looked like she was about to cry.

When Coulter did get up to speak, she continuously pumped her new book, and got booed by the entire audience.

As she told her jokes, the audience sat mostly stone-faced -- it quickly got painful. At one point, we almost fell sorry for her.

Here were some of our favorite gems:

SNL's Pete Davidson on Ann Coulter

Ann Coulter, if you're here, who's scaring the crows away from our crops?

Last year we had Martha Stewart who sells sheets, this year we have Ann Coulter who cuts eyeholes in them.

Rob Riggle on Ann Coulter

Ann Coulter is here...which could mean only one thing -- someone must have said her name three times

Ann Coulter has a big angry bush...no joke, that's just a fun fact

Jewel on Ann Coulter

As a feminist, I can't support everything that's been said up here tonight...but as someone who hates Ann Coulter, I'm delighted

What's wierd is...gay men love Ann Coulter -- that's because two seconds into hearing her speak they remember why they hate p----

Jimmy Carr on Ann Coulter

Ann Coulter...here we go: Ann Coulter is one of the most repugnant, hateful, hatchet-faced bitches alive...but it's not too late to change, Ann. You could kill yourself.

Ann Coulter looks so much like a truck stop transvestite whore, that I saw Jeff Ross run to an ATM just before the show.

Ann Coulter's p-----...is now so old and dry that it just got a job drawing cartoons for the New Yorker.

Peyton Manning on Ann Coulter

I just realized that I'm not the only athlete up here tonight...as you all know, earlier in the year, Ann Coulter won the Kentucky Derby

Nikki Glaser on Ann Coulter

Without fuhrer ado, Ann Coulter

Ann what's it like to be a real-life supervillain? I'd ask you how you sleep at night, but I assume it's upside-down in a robe of 100 dalmatians

Ann Coulter has written 11 books, 12 if you count Mein Kampf

Ann's been called things like a racist, anti-Semitic, homophobic, a white supremacist...and that's just while getting plowed by Bill Maher

The only person you will ever make happy is the Mexican who digs your grave

Ralph Macchio on Ann Coulter

Ann Coulter...I respect you, you're the one female commentator who's not afraid to stand up...to take a leak

David Spade on Ann Coulter

And now a real treat for fans of hate watching...Ann Coulter's coming up...Ann hopes the Republicans can hold on to the House so she can continue to haunt it.

She seems stiff and conservative, but Ann gets wild in the sheets -- just ask the Klan.

Looks like she's having a good time...I haven't seen you laugh so hard since Trayvon Martin got shot.

Jeff Ross on Ann Coulter

Ann what happened...you wrote 11 books but you couldn't write a single [expletive] joke?

(that got more applause than any of her jokes)

Ann you have a face that would make doves cry

How do I roast somebody from Hell? Bitch!

Oh and that voice...it's like fingernails on a chalkboard inside an inner-city school you want to defund.

Don't stare at me with that roasting bitch-face...Ann's against gay marriage...what's your thinking on that? If I can't get a husband, they shouldn't either?

Rob Lowe on Ann Coulter

It's 56 days to Halloween, but I see that Ann Coulter is already in her skeleton costume

People ask why is Ann Coulter here tonight? The answer: because the right-to-lifers wanted everyone to see what an abortion looks like up close

And you know Ann, after seeing your set tonight, I think we've witnessed the first bombing you can't blame on a Muslim

Photo credit: Gage Skidmore